Dear Switzerland,
Abyss or change, that’s the question.
Everything was ready to live abroad for a few months. It was all organized and planned. The anticipation was endless, and I could hardly wait to finally get on the plane. I wanted to escape from my current life. Over the last months, I projected everything on this coming period while at the same time, I looked forward very much. I thought, as soon as I’ve gone, my insecurities and anxieties will be gone as well. Of course, this sounds completely ridiculous and naïve. But on the other hand, I’ve mentally prepared to change a lot of my habits and behavior so I’ve kept telling myself that something will be different in my inner life when this adventure begins. But we live in challenging times. Sooner or later I had to recognize that taking the flight would neither be wisely nor responsible. Cities were shutting down; schools have closed all over the world.
The virus affects everyone, and I know that we need to act beyond our self-interests, personal desires and expectations. Uncertainty is in the air, whoever you meet, wherever you go. I am a believer in the maxim that everything happens for a reason. I guess that every single person can despite all negative impacts learn something positive/useful/different/challenging for their lives during those exceptional times.
Due to this fact, the only question I could ask myself was: What means this turning tide for us? What can I personally learn by stepping back and look at the situation from a different angle?
I realized that the answers have already been known, deep inside the mysterious jungle of my mind. But they haven’t awakened until an exogenous impulse or frankly spoken “shock” was entering our life.
We cannot escape our mental struggles by running away. They'll catch up with us sooner or later. We have to learn to cope with ourselves no matter where we are. We have to face those fears and find stillness in our restless souls.
The virus forced me to stay at home, the place I desperately wanted to leave. This automatically forced me to ask myself, what is the reason for this longing? What is it that makes me want to leave? Step 1 was completed: Face reality and ask unpleasant questions that make you feel uncomfortable. Step 2 was a bit less straight forward. It was about accepting the fact that we cannot plan everything, that it isn’t necessary to have figured it all out yet and that sometimes things happen that we did not expect. I can assure you that finding true acceptance for those three points is not an easy task for a constantly overthinking twentysomething. Now that I have somehow resigned myself to staying here, I had to realize that the root cause was quite serious. Covid-19. Did it manifest itself as an abyss or a change? Undoubtedly, the former was the case for me. I was angry, sad, annoyed, irritated, worried, intimidated and confused all at the same time. I wanted to push this virus-circumstance away from me and keep my eyes and ears closed. This was the moment when Step 3 kicked in. Due to having really good friends who keep on supporting me throughout my life, I took a glimpse on some more confronting questions. What if we have a look at the virus from another point of view? What if it caused me to stay here in order to fight my battles instead of starting an escape attempt? What if the meaning of such a pandemic outbreak was to trigger everyone to pause and take notice? Suddenly, it hit me overwhelmingly. Simply being aware. Pure being. Appreciation. Gratefulness. Finding stillness. Step 3 was accomplished when time seemed to stop for a delirious rendezvous with the eternal now. To be honest, it’s not as esoteric as it sounds. I just found a way to witness light shining in through the broken pieces of our crumbling system.
Step 4 I guess, was my changing awareness from the “abyss-opinion” in the direction of seeing it as a potential change not only for me but for all of us. I have heard so many different aspects: An emergency brake for our meritocracy, our performance and consummation driven society. A breathing for nature just before her suffocation. A pause for thought, rethinking and solicitude. An opportunity to realize how incredibly fragile and valuable our earth is, and that it takes all of us to keep it intact. To see that we are all in the same boat, no matter where we live, no matter what status we have. Equality. Focus on values that we have eclipsed in the fog of our lives. To stop constantly longing for the future, hoping for better times or mourning the good old days and start appreciating the present and being grateful for our enormous privileges. Maybe realize that many conditions in the world could be different. That hunger, need, refugee crises, corruption, violence, oppression and mistreatment determine the daily lives of many people. Think about that.
Such a virus brings many victims, it is a tragedy and I send all my energy to the people in need and suffer. Let us change our minds. Let us begin to help each other. Each one of us should take something out of it for his life and contribute to a fundamental transformation of the entire world system. Thank you.
Everything was ready to live abroad for a few months. It was all organized and planned. The anticipation was endless, and I could hardly wait to finally get on the plane. I wanted to escape from my current life. Over the last months, I projected everything on this coming period while at the same time, I looked forward very much. I thought, as soon as I’ve gone, my insecurities and anxieties will be gone as well. Of course, this sounds completely ridiculous and naïve. But on the other hand, I’ve mentally prepared to change a lot of my habits and behavior so I’ve kept telling myself that something will be different in my inner life when this adventure begins. But we live in challenging times. Sooner or later I had to recognize that taking the flight would neither be wisely nor responsible. Cities were shutting down; schools have closed all over the world.
The virus affects everyone, and I know that we need to act beyond our self-interests, personal desires and expectations. Uncertainty is in the air, whoever you meet, wherever you go. I am a believer in the maxim that everything happens for a reason. I guess that every single person can despite all negative impacts learn something positive/useful/different/challenging for their lives during those exceptional times.
Due to this fact, the only question I could ask myself was: What means this turning tide for us? What can I personally learn by stepping back and look at the situation from a different angle?
I realized that the answers have already been known, deep inside the mysterious jungle of my mind. But they haven’t awakened until an exogenous impulse or frankly spoken “shock” was entering our life.
We cannot escape our mental struggles by running away. They'll catch up with us sooner or later. We have to learn to cope with ourselves no matter where we are. We have to face those fears and find stillness in our restless souls.
The virus forced me to stay at home, the place I desperately wanted to leave. This automatically forced me to ask myself, what is the reason for this longing? What is it that makes me want to leave? Step 1 was completed: Face reality and ask unpleasant questions that make you feel uncomfortable. Step 2 was a bit less straight forward. It was about accepting the fact that we cannot plan everything, that it isn’t necessary to have figured it all out yet and that sometimes things happen that we did not expect. I can assure you that finding true acceptance for those three points is not an easy task for a constantly overthinking twentysomething. Now that I have somehow resigned myself to staying here, I had to realize that the root cause was quite serious. Covid-19. Did it manifest itself as an abyss or a change? Undoubtedly, the former was the case for me. I was angry, sad, annoyed, irritated, worried, intimidated and confused all at the same time. I wanted to push this virus-circumstance away from me and keep my eyes and ears closed. This was the moment when Step 3 kicked in. Due to having really good friends who keep on supporting me throughout my life, I took a glimpse on some more confronting questions. What if we have a look at the virus from another point of view? What if it caused me to stay here in order to fight my battles instead of starting an escape attempt? What if the meaning of such a pandemic outbreak was to trigger everyone to pause and take notice? Suddenly, it hit me overwhelmingly. Simply being aware. Pure being. Appreciation. Gratefulness. Finding stillness. Step 3 was accomplished when time seemed to stop for a delirious rendezvous with the eternal now. To be honest, it’s not as esoteric as it sounds. I just found a way to witness light shining in through the broken pieces of our crumbling system.
Step 4 I guess, was my changing awareness from the “abyss-opinion” in the direction of seeing it as a potential change not only for me but for all of us. I have heard so many different aspects: An emergency brake for our meritocracy, our performance and consummation driven society. A breathing for nature just before her suffocation. A pause for thought, rethinking and solicitude. An opportunity to realize how incredibly fragile and valuable our earth is, and that it takes all of us to keep it intact. To see that we are all in the same boat, no matter where we live, no matter what status we have. Equality. Focus on values that we have eclipsed in the fog of our lives. To stop constantly longing for the future, hoping for better times or mourning the good old days and start appreciating the present and being grateful for our enormous privileges. Maybe realize that many conditions in the world could be different. That hunger, need, refugee crises, corruption, violence, oppression and mistreatment determine the daily lives of many people. Think about that.
Such a virus brings many victims, it is a tragedy and I send all my energy to the people in need and suffer. Let us change our minds. Let us begin to help each other. Each one of us should take something out of it for his life and contribute to a fundamental transformation of the entire world system. Thank you.
#0020
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